E-mail Scott
Scott's Links
About the Author
Opinion Archives
Social Media:
Google Plus
Monthly Archives:

January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
April 2012
May 2012
June 2012
July 2012
August 2012
September 2012
October 2012
November 2012
December 2012
January 2013
February 2013
March 2013
April 2013
May 2013
June 2013
July 2013
August 2013
September 2013
October 2013
November 2013
December 2013
January 2014
February 2014
March 2014
April 2014
May 2014
June 2014
July 2014
August 2014
September 2014
October 2014
November 2014
December 2014
January 2015
February 2015
March 2015
April 2015
May 2015
June 2015
July 2015
August 2015
September 2015
October 2015
November 2015
December 2015
January 2016
February 2016
March 2016
April 2016
May 2016
June 2016
July 2016
August 2016
September 2016
October 2016
November 2016
December 2016
January 2017
February 2017
March 2017
April 2017
May 2017

Powered by Blogger
Subscribe via RSS

Monday, September 1, 2014

Courting vs. Dating: The debate rages

Posted by Scott Tibbs at 4:00 AM (#)

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. -- Proverbs 22:6

I recently read three interesting blog posts regarding dating and the alternative many Christians are embracing, courting. (Whatever that means. Definitions of both can vary wildly.) See here and here and here for more. So what is the best answer? In my opinion, the answer is neither and both.

The first thing we have to do as Christians is to not make our personal preferences into a theological absolute. Different people have different commitments and absent a clear commandment from Scripture (such as believers not joining with unbelievers) we should not be saying that our way is the only right way to live.

Christian liberty covers a large swath of our lives and as Christians we need to be both loving and humble enough to realize that the way we do things might not be the best choice for someone else. That is where we find ourselves with courting and dating.

Different families have different relationships, histories and personalities, as well as different levels of holiness, purity and wisdom. Even within a family, what is the right choice for one teenager may not be the right choice for another teenager. Christian parents have to use discernment in deciding what is best for their particular situation, while considering applicable Biblical principles.

Both courting and dating can be supervised by parents, to guard their teenagers against sin and to avoid unnecessarily tempting situations. In both systems, parents of both sexes should be involved and examine whether the other teen is a good match or a potential anchor dragging down their son or daughter. Both systems, with appropriate parental supervision and involvement, are infinitely superior to the "hookup" culture that is so pervasive, especially on college campuses.

Above all else, parents need to teach their children and teens the foundational moral principles of Scripture so they can apply those principles themselves. Once a teenager turns 18 and either heads off to college or into the workforce, the opportunity for parents to supervise is either lost or greatly diminished. All we can do as parents is teach our children well and pray that God will reign in their hearts as they get older.

That starts at birth and never ends.

Below are the rules for commenting on ConservaTibbs.com.

  1. A reasonable level of civility is expected. While it is expected that controversial political and social issues may generate heated debate, there are common-sense limits of civility that will be enforced.

  2. This blog is a family-friendly site. Therefore no cursing, profanity, vulgarity, obscenity, etc. will be allowed. This is a zero-tolerance rule and will result in automatic deletion of the offending post.

  3. Anonymity has greatly coarsened discourse on the Internet, so pseudonyms are discouraged but not forbidden. That said, any direct criticism of a person by name cannot be done anonymously. If you criticize someone, you have to subject yourself to the same level of scrutiny or the comment will be deleted.

  4. Please keep your comments relevant to the topic of the post.

  5. All moderation decisions are final. I may post an explanation or I may not, depending on the situation. If you have a question or a concern about a moderation decision, e-mail me privately rather than posting in the comments.

Thank you for your cooperation.